Charmed
Life
Gretheline
Genciana Ramos-Bolandrina
Loyalty
"Loyalty is still the same,
Whether it win or lose the game; True as a dial to the sun, Although it be
not shined upon."
Recently, a friend who's taking his Masters
in Public Management asked for my input on how I see the "values of importance
to him." As part of his paper/portfolio, he was tasked to make a personal
mission, vision of life then, now and the future. He chose to write about
honesty, righteousness, peace and joy. I wrote about loyalty. Here, I'm sharing
an excerpt of what I sent.
We met in the early eighties, I was a new
kid in school. Word was, he had a "crush" on me though he never said much.
I got flowers, cards and gifts, on occasions. We worked well in groups, for
school projects and reports. Mostly, he did school work, he was much more
diligent than I. Even back then, he took life seriously. Not one to be idle,
he's also competitive. He could have been more popular but he was quiet and
shy. I understood how much he loved his mother. How much respect he held
for his father. His brothers looked up to him. College separated us. I shared
in his joy of passing the CPA examination, was very proud of him. In his
humble way, I knew he was proud to make it and his parents were ecstatic.
We found each other again, as professionals. Only to say our goodbyes, as
I leave for Boston to work as an RN. No promises made, no future plans. We
drifted out of each other's life.
Visualizing Crisalde D. Julaton on his 75th
birthday or his and Cynthia's 50th wedding anniversary and imagining what
all his friends and family would say. What would his own children say? Smart,
thoughtful, fun, athletic, good sport, so much more. I will add that he is
the person "he" always wanted to be. I don't think he ever wrestled with
issues that make him question who he has become, where he is in life. I don't
believe he ever had issues that offend his set of values. I do not know if
he has regrets. There is not one bit of hate in his bone. I have no knowledge
of him having any enemies. I believe he loves his place in the world. He
started his life on the right foot, kept at the right path. He is content
but is not resting on his laurels.The values he talks about encompass simple
pleasures. Protecting his wife and children, providing for them. Enjoying
life. Weekend get-aways, picnics, swimming. It is all about honesty in personal
relationships. He has not forgotten about what is important. He makes decisions
and sticks to them. Somehow, he is able to confidently chart a new course
when he's at a crossroad. He has connected with his own unique purpose.
Fast forward to the present. We have separate
lives and are still friends. Our friendship of 26 years is best described
as loyal. I suppose everybody wants their friend to be loyal. Question loyalty
in friendship? It is sticking with somebody through thick and thin, good
times and bad, ups and downs. Sort of an undying loyalty that a dog gives
to its keeper. Webster's dictionary defines it as ". . . faithful to a cause,
ideal, custom, institution, or product." In our friendship I found it to
be unconditional. He is respectful and dutiful. We have a respectful
relationship. He has given me support when I was faced with a conflict. When
I was going through difficult times. When I made mistakes and bad judgement
calls, he opened dialogue. I feel that I could say anything to him or nothing
at all. No pretense. He sees the friend in me and is not judgmental. He is
loyal to himself in that he sets his standards which he measures up to. He
speaks up and is heard. I do hear him. We have mutual respect. He may have
named honesty, righteousness, peace and joy as the values that guide him,
but from this end, ultimately it is his loyalty as a friend that endears
him. Loyalty that will forever have a niche in my heart.
Feel free to e-mail me reactions, comments
and or suggestions for ideas to ponder. Contact me at
Gretheline@aol.com or through Carousel
Productions. |
