Charmed Life by Gretheline Bolandrina

As teenage classmates, Gina and I were not even close pals. I assume we shared the same teenage angst, agonized over our unrequited crushes, toiled over all our schoolwork. I know we did share a love for the written word, writing poetry and reading books. I hadn’t seen her in about twenty years. Several accidental meetings at the University of Santo Tomas when we were in college were all that I remember. Back then on campus, I pass by her building (Architecture & Fine Arts) to get to mine (Nursing & Medicine). We’d catch each other’s gaze across the busy covered walkway, she in her brown “Archi” uniform, looking cool in an earthy-crunchy way, me in my pristine white Nursing uniform, clinical lab coat in a clear plastic wardrobe bag on one hand, my nurse’s cap in another, looking all geeky and dorky. Her hair, a casual pretty wavy brownish hue, blowing freely in the breeze, mine (though black and shiny) usually is pulled back in a tight bun per clinical regulations. We’d do quick hellos and even quicker goodbyes. Sometime in the mid 1990’s we’ve reconnected via snail mail (I’m in Boston, she’s in Singapore). We exchanged long missives then. Long as in three to four pages, handwritten. Mostly we exchanged updates on how life’s been treating us. Then we sort of lost touch, life getting in the way, only to be reconnected middle of this year. Our 25th high school reunion is a couple of months away. We’ve been getting reacquainted thanks to instant messaging and “ym” conferences. Our “chats” unearth my younger self, the “Ethel” that had been forgotten but quickly became familiar. Reconnecting with Gina reminds me of the person I once was. We started calling each other “gf”, recalling many things about us that had in our minds been buried over time. It was as if, together we are opening a wonderful present and as we unfold a layer of wrapping paper, we unveil pleasant surprises. It feels enriching, having to share stories. There’s a sense of renewal. A wonderful friend from the past, transformed into the present and finding we share so much in common. A re-found connection with someone who seemed to have held bits and pieces, parts of me tucked safely away until I came to reclaim them. And she is giving it back to me freely.

I’ve not told her yet that in high school, I learned to French braid my hair by watching her. She was frank and favored hanging out with the boys in our class, something that the rest of the girls didn’t approve of. I however, admired her for that. Not that I wanted to be like her in that sense but the fact that she was sort of a “stand alone” and could make her own way appealed to me. She didn’t fit in the “typical Filipina girl” mode. Note to self, next time we’re online, definitely mention all that. There’s a sense of comfort, sincere pleasure in a renewed sense of self that came from reconnecting with Gina. Being in touch created a new sense of self-awareness. We’ve been confiding things to each other, something we didn’t even do in the past. It has helped me reappraise my values, prompted me to reevaluate myself and my connections to other people. Our chats have provided me with her perspectives, allowing me to see myself in a new light. The light she sees me in.

Recently, I had shared photos taken at several events my husband and I went to, Gina commented, “you look ravishing” and “you are fashionable”. Her words tickled me pink. It’s a cute declaration, a validation of what my hubby says all along. I’m struck by Gina’s generosity of words. And the fact that she’s “girly-girl” after all! I wouldn’t have thought that looks and fashion would be on her strong points. I guess we’ve really grown up. Don’t get me wrong, I do appreciate and realize that our friendship’s gone to a different level. We’re not the “joined at the hip”, call-me-for-every-little-thing kind of friend, (I have five sisters I do that with) but we are certainly close. We both know certain things about each other that only both of us know. We’ve both matured. Age, as in friendships get better in time. I can’t wait to see Gina in December. Outside of the actual High School reunion date, we’ve set a date after the reunion gathering, a lunch date, a design appointment/consult for a boutique project and general girl power bonding. I can’t wait to see her in person, start a new chapter of friendship and continue mirroring each other’s lives.

Feel free to e-mail me reactions, comments and or suggestions for ideas to ponder. Contact me at Gretheline@aol.com or through Carousel Productions.